An adoption story: Is blood really thicker than water?

 

I’m thrilled to share this column that my daughter Arianna wrote on the Netflix documentary “Found,” which tells the story of three teenage girls adopted from China who eventually discover that they are blood relatives.
We adopted Arianna from China in 1997, and the movie resonated deeply with her, so she decided to share her thoughts on the film and the issues that it explored.

This column appeared Dec. 9, 2021, in The Sun Chronicle of Attleboro, MA. The column link:  https://www.thesunchronicle.com/opinion/columns/guest-column-is-blood-really-thicker-than-water/article_15055b6e-1e60-5d1d-be12-272ac041cf97.html


On Oct. 20, 2021, Netflix released a documentary titled “Found,” which was directed and produced by Amanda Lipitz. The documentary follows the story of three teenage girls adopted from China who ultimately discover they are blood-related through the common genetics test, 23 and Me. The film shares the stories of cousins Chloe, Lily and Sadie, raising themes of self-identity and discovery.
Between 1980 and 2015, China strictly enforced its one-child policy, which put a premium on families with boys. The law caused thousands of Chinese children, mostly girls, to be placed in orphanages, foster care and adoption centers.
The emotional sentiments the girls faced in the film were all too familiar to me. Like the girls in the documentary, I’m also adopted from China. While I still grapple with the idea of sharing my story, these girls are brave enough to let a piece of them be exposed to the public --- a public that many parents and adoptees can relate to and feel comforted by.
Admittedly, the film challenged me. It took me two days to watch. With my own personal connections to the girls, I struggled to witness the internal conflicts the girls faced.
I really empathized with the girls when they first connected with each other via FaceTime. It reminded me how important it is to talk about these topics with people who share a similar experience.


My adoption story

 I was adopted at the age of 15 months on Sept. 19, 1997, in the Anhui Province of China in the city of Hefei. The adoption agency my parents went through connected other families that were going through the same process before going to China. There were 11 families, including mine, in total. This connection quickly became a group, a group that would meet yearly.
Our families did a wonderful job organizing annual reunions over the summers. They made sure we stayed connected, although I often rejected the idea of meeting up with the girls and accepting my own cultural roots.
When the girls and I hit 18 and headed off to college, our parents handed over the responsibility of staying in touch with each other to us. I have to give credit to one of the girls in particular. Throughout the years, she started a Facebook group chat, and wished us well during important times of the year. I was inattentive to most of it up until recently. This documentary inspired me to get in touch with this group to understand their own version of their story.

The nature of families
The film closes by sharing a piece of Sadie’s AP literature essay:
“Family are the people who make an effort to be there for you. They know, love and accept me for who I am.”
That really resonated with me. Similar to Sadie, I truly believe families don’t necessarily have to be connected by blood. I am lucky to have loving, supportive parents and friends who have guided and continue to care for me.

Arianna Kessler was raised in North Attleboro after being adopted by retired Sun Chronicle Local News Editor Larry Kessler and his wife Lynne Cains in Hefei, China on Sept. 19, 1997. She’s a 2014 graduate of North Attleboro High School and a 2018 Bridgewater State University graduate. She’s currently an elementary school teacher in Revere.